Monday, May 21, 2012
Micah is here!
Our baby boy is here! He was born Saturday morning at 2:30 am, weighing 6 lb, 5 oz. I have some pictures from the hospital, but they're on the laptop, so I will upload more soon. For now, here's a quick peek at our beautiful boy. We are definitely in love!
Monday, May 14, 2012
May Catch Up
Once again, I've been terrible about updating this blog. There's so much going on these days, and I feel like I'm doing the best I can just to keep the 2 big kids fed and get them where they need to go each day! New Baby will be here within a week. My induction is scheduled for next Tuesday, May 22nd, unless he comes before then. So it won't be long now, and that's a good thing because my belly can not possibly stretch any more!
Here are a couple pictures from the last couple weeks...
Uncle Michael came to visit for a few days when he was here for a work trip. He and Chris had lots of fun tricking people with the twin thing. The funny part is that it didn't trick Jude for even one second. He knew immediately that was NOT his daddy, but he still had fun playing with Uncle Michael!
CB got to run in the Kids Country Music Marathon a few weeks back. It was the first year she was old enough, and she was very excited. It's a great event for kids. Every year leading up to the big Country Music Marathon, kids can register for the Kids Marathon. Over the weeks and months before the event, they are encouraged to run or walk 25.2 miles and keep track of how much they've done. Then on the evening of the big race, they run the final mile together and get to cross the finish line at the Titans' Stadium downtown, just like the grown-ups do the next day. It's a great way to promote physical activity among kids. Her school had a group of kids participating, so they did some of their miles during PE class at school, and we did the rest together as a family. She had a lot of fun, and out of the thousands of kids who participated, she and Chris even got their picture in the paper the next day!
This was the picture that was in the paper. She and Chris held hands during the whole run. So cute!
J is still doing great at school and amazing us with the progress he's making, especially with his speech/language and social skills. We had been praying and hoping that he would make this kind of progress, but we never expected it to happen so quickly. We are thrilled with how well he's doing, we love love love his school, and we're excited to see him continue to pick up skills like a superstar!
Other than that, we're just waiting for New Baby to come join us any time!
Here are a couple pictures from the last couple weeks...
Uncle Michael came to visit for a few days when he was here for a work trip. He and Chris had lots of fun tricking people with the twin thing. The funny part is that it didn't trick Jude for even one second. He knew immediately that was NOT his daddy, but he still had fun playing with Uncle Michael!
CB got to run in the Kids Country Music Marathon a few weeks back. It was the first year she was old enough, and she was very excited. It's a great event for kids. Every year leading up to the big Country Music Marathon, kids can register for the Kids Marathon. Over the weeks and months before the event, they are encouraged to run or walk 25.2 miles and keep track of how much they've done. Then on the evening of the big race, they run the final mile together and get to cross the finish line at the Titans' Stadium downtown, just like the grown-ups do the next day. It's a great way to promote physical activity among kids. Her school had a group of kids participating, so they did some of their miles during PE class at school, and we did the rest together as a family. She had a lot of fun, and out of the thousands of kids who participated, she and Chris even got their picture in the paper the next day!
This was the picture that was in the paper. She and Chris held hands during the whole run. So cute!
J is still doing great at school and amazing us with the progress he's making, especially with his speech/language and social skills. We had been praying and hoping that he would make this kind of progress, but we never expected it to happen so quickly. We are thrilled with how well he's doing, we love love love his school, and we're excited to see him continue to pick up skills like a superstar!
Other than that, we're just waiting for New Baby to come join us any time!
Thursday, April 26, 2012
Re-Evaluation
So Tuesday was a big day for our little J. We took him back to the hospital to be re-evaluated by the developmental psychologist who saw him back in February. We didn't know this for the initial evaluation in February, but apparently the doctor we saw is one of the country's leading autism experts. He is THE man to see, and we are thankful that not only were we able to schedule an evaluation with him very quickly in February, but we were also able to see him again, and we'll be seeing him again in July. He really is great. So anyway, there was a part of me that was hoping that he would spend a few minutes with J, see the progress he has made, and immediately say "Oh, he's fine! Go on home. You have nothing to worry about." However, I knew that wasn't a realistic scenario (but I still wanted it!). So we knew that our two most realistic scenarios would be that the doctor would either definitively diagnose J with ASD, or that he would continue to be uncertain about the diagnosis. Fortunately, the latter scenario is the one that occurred, and it really was the best news we could have realistically hoped for at this time.
After talking with us and observing/evaluating J, the doctor agreed that he has made amazing progress. His language has really taken off. The speech therapist at his school told us that the goals they are beginning to set for him are almost age-appropriate, which means that his language skills are nearly caught up to where they should be for a child his age. That's very encouraging. And since he's started at his new school, his social interaction skills are improving like crazy. He is so much more socially interactive and so much less overwhelmed and intimidated by new people/new surroundings. He's friendly, outgoing, affectionate (even with new people), makes great eye contact, plays back-and-forth interaction games, and is even beginning to engage in some pretend/imaginative play (feeding a baby, giving a toy dog a drink, pretending to have Elmo talk to a baby, etc). The lead therapist at his school told me the other day that she has never seen a child make so much progress in such a short amount of time. So of course we're very encouraged by all of this. However, there are still some red flags. He still has some areas of vulnerability where he's just not interacting in a developmentally typical and appropriate way. Here are some examples: When he wants someone to do something, like blow bubbles, instead of handing the bubbles to the adult and saying "More bubbles," he will throw them in the adult's lap. He may follow up by saying "More bubbles!" But he doesn't look the person in the eye, hand it to him, and make the request. It may seem like a small thing, but it's an important social skill. He's improving in this area because he's being trained on how to request things appropriately, but typically developing children pick up on this type of skill simply by observing the appropriate behavior being modeled. J doesn't. It's also very difficult to divert his attention. He rarely follows someone's gaze or point when they try to direct his attention to something specific, and sometimes does not respond even with repeated use of his name. These are just a few examples, but there are several of these social/communication skills that are still challenging for him.
Overall, the doctor feels very optimistic and encouraged by his progress. He does not feel confident making a diagnosis of ASD at this time, but he is still concerned about J's red flags and areas of vulnerability. He recommended that we continue with our current course of action, continue the interventions we have in place, then come back in 3 months to see if things may be a little more clear at that time.
So now we begin to process what this means and how we feel about it. I know it was the best news we could have hoped for, so I'm glad for that. But at the same time, I just wish someone could tell me for sure that my little boy is going to be just fine. I still hope that he doesn't end up on the autism spectrum, I hope that he develops strong and appropriate social skills, I hope that he will develop healthy, intimate relationships, I hope that he will be able to clearly communicate his thoughts and feelings, I hope that he will one day understand who Jesus is, and I hope that he will understand how very, very loved he is. I want him to be smart, I want him to do well in school, I want him to be able to do anything he wants to do in life. I want all of this so much for him, yet I have no guarantee that any of it will happen. We're doing everything we can do to help him reach those goals, but ultimately we have to surrender our child to the One who created him. We know that God formed this sweet, beautiful little boy for a specific purpose. I may have goals and dreams for him, but they may or may not be the same goals for which he was created. So we will pray and we will love him, and we will continue to get him the best interventionists and therapists that we can find. And somehow we will continue to hope in the midst of the uncertainty. This is why we can continue to hope, even when we can't see what's ahead and it feels like we're walking with blinders on....
"Even the darkness is not dark to you. The night is bright as day..." ----Psalm 139:12
Monday, April 23, 2012
Update on J's Progress
As promised, here's a quick update on our little J. He started at his new "school" almost 3 weeks ago, and he really loves it. I mentioned earlier that their parking lot is tiny, so they send a staff member out to the parking lot to bring the kids in from the car. We knew this would be difficult for J, and he did cry for quite a while on the first day. We thought it would be hard for a while, but that eventually he would get used to it and do fine. What we didn't expect, however, was that "eventually" would happen on the second day! On only his second day, the minute he saw the OT open his car door, he got super excited, smiled, hopped right out of the car, grabbed her hand, and marched inside. He's done great every day at drop-off except for one day when a staff member he didn't know picked him up. Other than that one day, he is always excited to get to school and go play. As soon as we pull in to the parking lot, he says "Baby Cool ("school"). Go play. Cool. Play. Bye Mama!" It's such a relief to me to know that he's excited to go, and I'm SO glad I don't have to watch him be pulled screaming and crying from the car every morning!
We love his school just as much as he does. The therapists are all great. I've spent a lot of time there in the past few weeks observing him in therapy and in class, and I've already learned so much about how to interact with him and help him learn new skills. And as far as his skills go, he's doing great! His language skills have exploded in the past month. He started making 2-word combinations a few weeks ago, and within a couple days he was doing it like a pro. Now he's even making some 3-4 word combinations (things like "all done purple ball," "more watch Elmo," "my turn bubbles," etc.). We're amazed at how much his language skills have improved in such a short time. But even more impressive is the way his social skills are improving. He used to seem so overwhelmed around new people, like all the sensory input of being in a new place and around new people was just too much for him to handle, so he was clingy and whiny and would engage in self-soothing, repetitive behaviors. All of a sudden, he doesn't seem nearly so overwhelmed by new people. In fact, in the grocery store he walks up to strangers, smiles, and says "Hi! Hi!" over and over until they say hi back to him. And this week he marched right in to his class room in the church nursery without a backward glance. He has ALWAYS cried when I dropped him off in the church nursery. He's much more interested in playing with other kids, even calling them by name and following them on the play ground. This is amazing progress for a kid who just 2 months ago didn't want anything to do with other kids. He warms up to strangers so much more quickly now - he sits in the therapists' laps and gives them hugs. He never used to give hugs to anyone except me and Chris! And most amazing of all, last week a friend of mine from high school, her husband, and their 7 children spent the night here on their way through Nashville. I thought J would freak out at the sight of so many new people, especially since they arrived after he went to bed, so he woke up the next morning to a house FULL of people. But he did great! He spent about a minute looking around and assessing the situation, then he jumped right in the middle of those kids and played along. He even let them hug him and he gave hugs in return - no crying, no screaming, no repetitive, self-soothing behaviors. Totally amazing!
So we are very happy with his progress and encouraged by how quickly he's picking things up. But it hasn't all been rosy these past few weeks. There is always an adjustment period with a new school, and J is definitely struggling to adjust. When he's actually at school, he does great. When he comes home, he melts down. His school is only 3 hours every Monday through Thursday morning, but they are 3 very intense hours. So I know he's tired, but I think his brain is also a little bit on overload right now. There is so much new information and new input for him to process, and he has a hard time settling down and resting. The first couple weeks he didn't nap much at all, but he would stay in his bed for 3 hours just talking to himself and chattering away. And he was waking up every night screaming inconsolably. Nothing we did would calm him down. He's slowly doing better - some days he falls asleep during nap time, other times he just lies in his bed and chatters. Most nights he sleeps well, but some nights he still wakes up crying. And during the day he is having more tantrums and meltdowns than usual. Today when we came home from school he cried for over an hour straight. Part of the time he was lying on the floor moaning, the rest of the time he was screaming and kicking me away. Eventually he was able to calm down, but it's been hard to watch him struggle so much to settle his brain down. And of course it's exhausting for his 8-months pregnant mama! But he is beginning to settle in to the routine and we will continue to be as patient as we can to help him through this transition. We're glad his little brain is soaking up so many new skills and sensory input, but it will take a while for him to be able to comfortably process it all.
Tomorrow J has his re-evaluation at Vanderbilt with the developmental psychologist. We are very anxious to hear what the doctor has to say about his progress. Of course we're hoping that he still will not meet the criteria for an autism diagnosis, and we're optimistic that this could be a real possibility. That's what we're praying for! I'll update as soon as we hear from the doctor...
We love his school just as much as he does. The therapists are all great. I've spent a lot of time there in the past few weeks observing him in therapy and in class, and I've already learned so much about how to interact with him and help him learn new skills. And as far as his skills go, he's doing great! His language skills have exploded in the past month. He started making 2-word combinations a few weeks ago, and within a couple days he was doing it like a pro. Now he's even making some 3-4 word combinations (things like "all done purple ball," "more watch Elmo," "my turn bubbles," etc.). We're amazed at how much his language skills have improved in such a short time. But even more impressive is the way his social skills are improving. He used to seem so overwhelmed around new people, like all the sensory input of being in a new place and around new people was just too much for him to handle, so he was clingy and whiny and would engage in self-soothing, repetitive behaviors. All of a sudden, he doesn't seem nearly so overwhelmed by new people. In fact, in the grocery store he walks up to strangers, smiles, and says "Hi! Hi!" over and over until they say hi back to him. And this week he marched right in to his class room in the church nursery without a backward glance. He has ALWAYS cried when I dropped him off in the church nursery. He's much more interested in playing with other kids, even calling them by name and following them on the play ground. This is amazing progress for a kid who just 2 months ago didn't want anything to do with other kids. He warms up to strangers so much more quickly now - he sits in the therapists' laps and gives them hugs. He never used to give hugs to anyone except me and Chris! And most amazing of all, last week a friend of mine from high school, her husband, and their 7 children spent the night here on their way through Nashville. I thought J would freak out at the sight of so many new people, especially since they arrived after he went to bed, so he woke up the next morning to a house FULL of people. But he did great! He spent about a minute looking around and assessing the situation, then he jumped right in the middle of those kids and played along. He even let them hug him and he gave hugs in return - no crying, no screaming, no repetitive, self-soothing behaviors. Totally amazing!
So we are very happy with his progress and encouraged by how quickly he's picking things up. But it hasn't all been rosy these past few weeks. There is always an adjustment period with a new school, and J is definitely struggling to adjust. When he's actually at school, he does great. When he comes home, he melts down. His school is only 3 hours every Monday through Thursday morning, but they are 3 very intense hours. So I know he's tired, but I think his brain is also a little bit on overload right now. There is so much new information and new input for him to process, and he has a hard time settling down and resting. The first couple weeks he didn't nap much at all, but he would stay in his bed for 3 hours just talking to himself and chattering away. And he was waking up every night screaming inconsolably. Nothing we did would calm him down. He's slowly doing better - some days he falls asleep during nap time, other times he just lies in his bed and chatters. Most nights he sleeps well, but some nights he still wakes up crying. And during the day he is having more tantrums and meltdowns than usual. Today when we came home from school he cried for over an hour straight. Part of the time he was lying on the floor moaning, the rest of the time he was screaming and kicking me away. Eventually he was able to calm down, but it's been hard to watch him struggle so much to settle his brain down. And of course it's exhausting for his 8-months pregnant mama! But he is beginning to settle in to the routine and we will continue to be as patient as we can to help him through this transition. We're glad his little brain is soaking up so many new skills and sensory input, but it will take a while for him to be able to comfortably process it all.
Tomorrow J has his re-evaluation at Vanderbilt with the developmental psychologist. We are very anxious to hear what the doctor has to say about his progress. Of course we're hoping that he still will not meet the criteria for an autism diagnosis, and we're optimistic that this could be a real possibility. That's what we're praying for! I'll update as soon as we hear from the doctor...
Thursday, April 19, 2012
Spring...
I haven't done a great job of updating this blog in the past couple weeks! So today I dropped J off at school and my only goal for the morning was to work on the blog. So here we go....
CB had spring break the week that J started at his new school. Since J didn't start till Wednesday, we decided to take a quick day trip on Monday. We couldn't do a whole lot of traveling this year with me being super pregnant and J about to start school, so we went to Chattanooga and spent the day at the aquarium, which is always fun. CB's favorite part was the butterfly room. She tried so hard to catch a butterfly, but she was just too excited and couldn't be still enough to let one land on her. Then this sweet little girl named Claire walked up to us and asked if CB would like to hold her butterfly. So very carefully they transferred the butterfly to CB's little fingers. Look how happy she is!
Then, being the sweet big sister that she is, she wanted to show her butterfly to J, who was not so impressed. He yelled "NO!" and in this picture you can see half a second before he swatted that poor little butterfly off CB's finger. Poor girl. She was so sad!
A few more random shots from our time at the aquarium:
Later in the month came Easter egg coloring time! We let J sit this activity out. Maybe next year!
A quick picture of me at 33 weeks pregnant (I'm 34 1/2 weeks now). Just a few more weeks to go till we meet New Baby Boy!
So that's a quick look at what we've been up to in the past couple weeks. Things have been busy! Now that J is settled in to his therapy and those major decisions are behind us, we're finally starting to get ready for New Baby's arrival. Lots to do, lots to think about, and not nearly enough time! I'll post another update hopefully soon describing J's transition to his new school and how his progress is coming along. Stay tuned...
CB had spring break the week that J started at his new school. Since J didn't start till Wednesday, we decided to take a quick day trip on Monday. We couldn't do a whole lot of traveling this year with me being super pregnant and J about to start school, so we went to Chattanooga and spent the day at the aquarium, which is always fun. CB's favorite part was the butterfly room. She tried so hard to catch a butterfly, but she was just too excited and couldn't be still enough to let one land on her. Then this sweet little girl named Claire walked up to us and asked if CB would like to hold her butterfly. So very carefully they transferred the butterfly to CB's little fingers. Look how happy she is!
Then, being the sweet big sister that she is, she wanted to show her butterfly to J, who was not so impressed. He yelled "NO!" and in this picture you can see half a second before he swatted that poor little butterfly off CB's finger. Poor girl. She was so sad!
A few more random shots from our time at the aquarium:
Later in the month came Easter egg coloring time! We let J sit this activity out. Maybe next year!
A quick picture of me at 33 weeks pregnant (I'm 34 1/2 weeks now). Just a few more weeks to go till we meet New Baby Boy!
So that's a quick look at what we've been up to in the past couple weeks. Things have been busy! Now that J is settled in to his therapy and those major decisions are behind us, we're finally starting to get ready for New Baby's arrival. Lots to do, lots to think about, and not nearly enough time! I'll post another update hopefully soon describing J's transition to his new school and how his progress is coming along. Stay tuned...
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
First Day of School
J's first day of school!
He did really well this morning. When we dropped him off, a staff member came out to the car to get him, and he cried and cried and cried. We know that part will be hard for a while. I walked in with him but let the therapist carry him in to the building to help him get used to this new routine (their parking lot is tiny, so staff members bring the kids in to the building so parents don't have to park the car). He cried all the way in to the building. Then Chris and CB came inside and they took us back to the occupational therapy room where all the fun toys are. He kept crying for a while, so I let him sit in my lap and get used to his surroundings. Once CB walked in the room, they both climbed up on the swing, J found a ball, and all was well. Within a few minutes, Chris and I were able to sneak out to the observation room. They have cameras set up all over the building, and parents are invited/encouraged to observe their child as much as they like. So we sat in the observation room and watched J and CB play in the OT room. Once he was happy and comfortable, they took both of them upstairs to the classroom. CB helped him with the transition - I think just having her around made him feel more comfortable and less overwhelmed. So she stayed upstairs and played for about half an hour. After a while they took them both back to a different therapy room to work with a behavior therapist, and Chris and I were able to observe this also. J seemed happy and warmed up quickly to the therapist (probably because she had bubbles!). Then they went back upstairs to the classroom to play some more. I think CB would have liked to stay and play all day - they have super fun toys at this school! Tunnels, swings, trampolines, seesaws, balls, foam pits...you name it, they have it. But after about an hour they led CB out and let J stay by himself. He was perfectly happy the rest of the day.
Chris, CB, and I headed out after a while longer to enjoy a special Mommy/Daddy/CB brunch, since she's on spring break this week. It was fun to spend some special time with just her, and she enjoyed every minute of the extra attention. We headed back to the school to observe J for about another half hour - we got to see him in speech therapy as well as group circle time in the classroom. Surprisingly, he sat in the teacher's lap during circle time, stayed put, and participated the whole time. That's amazing for him, especially on his first day!
Then at dismissal they brought him downstairs to us, and he was super excited to see all of us. He really did great for his first day. I know that drop-off will be difficult for a while, especially since someone will be picking him up from the car and bringing him inside. But I plan to be there a lot, observing and participating in therapy sessions, so that will help make the separation much easier. We are so impressed with everything about this center, and I love that they encourage us as a family to be very involved. Once J gets used to the routine, I feel pretty sure that he will love it, and I can't wait to see how quickly he learns all kinds of new things!
It's a blessing and a relief to have this first day over with, and I'm sooooo glad that Chris and CB were able to come with me. It would have been much harder to face this day alone. Fortunately, we'll all get to go together tomorrow morning also, so Mommy AND J will both have some help through this transition time!
He did really well this morning. When we dropped him off, a staff member came out to the car to get him, and he cried and cried and cried. We know that part will be hard for a while. I walked in with him but let the therapist carry him in to the building to help him get used to this new routine (their parking lot is tiny, so staff members bring the kids in to the building so parents don't have to park the car). He cried all the way in to the building. Then Chris and CB came inside and they took us back to the occupational therapy room where all the fun toys are. He kept crying for a while, so I let him sit in my lap and get used to his surroundings. Once CB walked in the room, they both climbed up on the swing, J found a ball, and all was well. Within a few minutes, Chris and I were able to sneak out to the observation room. They have cameras set up all over the building, and parents are invited/encouraged to observe their child as much as they like. So we sat in the observation room and watched J and CB play in the OT room. Once he was happy and comfortable, they took both of them upstairs to the classroom. CB helped him with the transition - I think just having her around made him feel more comfortable and less overwhelmed. So she stayed upstairs and played for about half an hour. After a while they took them both back to a different therapy room to work with a behavior therapist, and Chris and I were able to observe this also. J seemed happy and warmed up quickly to the therapist (probably because she had bubbles!). Then they went back upstairs to the classroom to play some more. I think CB would have liked to stay and play all day - they have super fun toys at this school! Tunnels, swings, trampolines, seesaws, balls, foam pits...you name it, they have it. But after about an hour they led CB out and let J stay by himself. He was perfectly happy the rest of the day.
Chris, CB, and I headed out after a while longer to enjoy a special Mommy/Daddy/CB brunch, since she's on spring break this week. It was fun to spend some special time with just her, and she enjoyed every minute of the extra attention. We headed back to the school to observe J for about another half hour - we got to see him in speech therapy as well as group circle time in the classroom. Surprisingly, he sat in the teacher's lap during circle time, stayed put, and participated the whole time. That's amazing for him, especially on his first day!
Then at dismissal they brought him downstairs to us, and he was super excited to see all of us. He really did great for his first day. I know that drop-off will be difficult for a while, especially since someone will be picking him up from the car and bringing him inside. But I plan to be there a lot, observing and participating in therapy sessions, so that will help make the separation much easier. We are so impressed with everything about this center, and I love that they encourage us as a family to be very involved. Once J gets used to the routine, I feel pretty sure that he will love it, and I can't wait to see how quickly he learns all kinds of new things!
It's a blessing and a relief to have this first day over with, and I'm sooooo glad that Chris and CB were able to come with me. It would have been much harder to face this day alone. Fortunately, we'll all get to go together tomorrow morning also, so Mommy AND J will both have some help through this transition time!
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
Refuse to Fear
As I head to bed tonight, there are a million thoughts floating through my head. Tomorrow morning we will take J to his first day at his new school. While I feel confident that we've made the right decision, I still feel a little anxious about his first day. He doesn't do well with strangers or new environments. Will he be sad? Will he cry when we leave him? Will he be scared by his new surroundings and all the new people? Will he just miss me and wish his mommy was there with him? I have to admit, I feel this way every time one of my kids starts at a new school, but this time just feels harder. This time I also wonder if he will be getting everything he needs to help him gain the skills we're hoping he learns. I wonder if we've done everything we can for him. In the back of my mind, I wonder if we've made the right choice. It's called anxiety....worry....fear....and I struggle with it every single day.
Fortunately, I have some very wise and wonderful friends who understand this struggle and have armed me with beautiful words of truth. I've read through these words so many times over the past few weeks and months, and they just seem so appropriate tonight...right before we drop off our little boy in a brand new place full of brand new people, and surrender him to their professional expertise and care.
So as I head off to bed, these are the thoughts I'm choosing to allow in to my heart. These are the words I'm choosing to hear. This is the truth I'm choosing to believe...
From my friend Shannon and the Celtic Daily Prayer Book -
All that I love
into Your keeping.
All that I care for
into Your care.
Be with us by day,
be with us by night;
and as dark closes
the eyelids with sleep,
may I waken
to the peace of a new day.
From my friend Holly and the devotional book Jesus Calling (which I really need to read!) -
"I AM ABOVE ALL THINGS: your problems, your pain, and the swirling events in this ever-changing world. When you behold My Face you rise above circumstances and rest with Me in heavenly realms. This is the way of Peace, living in the Light of My Presence. I guarantee that you will always have problems in this life, but they must not become your focus. When you feel yourself sinking in the sea of circumstances, say "Help me, Jesus!" and I will draw you back to Me. If you have to say that thousands of times daily, don't be discouraged. I know your weakness, and I meet you in that very place."
Scripture references: Eph 2:6, Matt 14:28-32
And a song called "Rest" from my friend Holly -
Rest, the Lord is near. Refuse to fear. Enjoy his love.
Trust his mighty power fills every hour of all your days.
There is no need for needless worry. With such a savior you have no cause to ever doubt.
His perfect word. Still reassures in any trial.
Rest, the Lord is there. Lift up your prayer, for he is strong.
Trust he'll bring release and perfect peace will calm your mind.
There is no need for needless worry. With such a savior you have no cause to ever doubt.
His perfect word. Still reassures in any trial.
Call him if you grow frightened. Call him. With loving care
He'll lift the burden and you'll rest.
The Lord is near. Refuse to fear. Enjoy his love.
Trust, his mighty power fills every hour of all your days.
Rest, the Lord is near. Refuse to fear. Enjoy his love.
And finally, from God Himself (Isaiah 43) -
"Fear not, for I have redeemed you;
I have called you by name, you are mine.
When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;
and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you;
when you walk through fire you shall not be burned,
and the flame shall not consume you.
For I am the LORD your God,
the Holy One of Israel, your Savior....
Because you are precious in my eyes,
and honored, and I love you.
Fear not, for I am with you."
Fortunately, I have some very wise and wonderful friends who understand this struggle and have armed me with beautiful words of truth. I've read through these words so many times over the past few weeks and months, and they just seem so appropriate tonight...right before we drop off our little boy in a brand new place full of brand new people, and surrender him to their professional expertise and care.
So as I head off to bed, these are the thoughts I'm choosing to allow in to my heart. These are the words I'm choosing to hear. This is the truth I'm choosing to believe...
From my friend Shannon and the Celtic Daily Prayer Book -
All that I love
into Your keeping.
All that I care for
into Your care.
Be with us by day,
be with us by night;
and as dark closes
the eyelids with sleep,
may I waken
to the peace of a new day.
From my friend Holly and the devotional book Jesus Calling (which I really need to read!) -
"I AM ABOVE ALL THINGS: your problems, your pain, and the swirling events in this ever-changing world. When you behold My Face you rise above circumstances and rest with Me in heavenly realms. This is the way of Peace, living in the Light of My Presence. I guarantee that you will always have problems in this life, but they must not become your focus. When you feel yourself sinking in the sea of circumstances, say "Help me, Jesus!" and I will draw you back to Me. If you have to say that thousands of times daily, don't be discouraged. I know your weakness, and I meet you in that very place."
Scripture references: Eph 2:6, Matt 14:28-32
And a song called "Rest" from my friend Holly -
Rest, the Lord is near. Refuse to fear. Enjoy his love.
Trust his mighty power fills every hour of all your days.
There is no need for needless worry. With such a savior you have no cause to ever doubt.
His perfect word. Still reassures in any trial.
Rest, the Lord is there. Lift up your prayer, for he is strong.
Trust he'll bring release and perfect peace will calm your mind.
There is no need for needless worry. With such a savior you have no cause to ever doubt.
His perfect word. Still reassures in any trial.
Call him if you grow frightened. Call him. With loving care
He'll lift the burden and you'll rest.
The Lord is near. Refuse to fear. Enjoy his love.
Trust, his mighty power fills every hour of all your days.
Rest, the Lord is near. Refuse to fear. Enjoy his love.
And finally, from God Himself (Isaiah 43) -
"Fear not, for I have redeemed you;
I have called you by name, you are mine.
When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;
and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you;
when you walk through fire you shall not be burned,
and the flame shall not consume you.
For I am the LORD your God,
the Holy One of Israel, your Savior....
Because you are precious in my eyes,
and honored, and I love you.
Fear not, for I am with you."
But when all those words seem too difficult to speak, and I struggle to put my thoughts in to a coherent prayer, this is all I need...
From my other friend Shannon -
"You know what I long for, Lord. You hear my every sigh..." - Psalm 38:9
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